Just My Random Perverted Thoughts

MA looked the pages of the sex toy catalogue.
“Perhaps I should get a harness and a dildo, then I could give a good buggering!”
“And what makes you think I would want a buggering?”
“You offered your bum to someone else.”
“Not really, the chances of that ever happening are so remote.”
She turned her laptop around to show me the page. “How about this one?”
“Eye wateringly large.”
“Could you take it?”
“No!”
“We’ll find out soon, I just ordered it.”
“The full scenario was I got buggered then I get to use the cane, you up for the Lexan then.”
“I was not thinking of buggering you. Kiwi Boy is up for it, it’s on his list of things he wants to try.
“If he has never done it before then you’ll need a smaller dildo.”
MA click her mouse a few times.
“OK I have a selection on order!”

Kiwi Boy is in for an interesting time when next he comes to play!

See a picture on my Tumblr Blog.

At a recent play party we were all invited to share a fantasy that we had fantasised over for a long time but that was unfulfilled. Kiwi Boy’s fantasy was to be a slave, to be at the beck and call of a couple, to answer there every whim.

MA quite liked the idea of having a naked boy around the house for a long weekend, so she asked Kiwi Boy to write out the fantasy, list all the things he wanted to do and have done to him. I added that he should also list all the stuff he didn’t want, the hard limits.

A few days later MA received an amazingly detailed email full of pervy stuff. So we invited ‘Kiwi Boy’ to be ‘Slave Boy’ for the weekend.

So from Friday evening until Monday morning we had a slave.
More fun I could not imagine.
I was really the voyeur in all this but it was A M A Z I N G! & A W E S O M E!

Now that summer is finally here in the UK the kinky parties have stopped until the autumn. Attendance at the local munch has dropped off as well.

So why is kink a winter activity?

I am kinky all year around, and everyone else should be too!

I have had a few emails and comments regarding the shopping spree to buy MA her party outfit, so I thought that I would share a little bit more information.

Nestling in North London is the town of Watford, famous for it’s football club and kinky shopping. OK so the football is slightly more famous than the kinky shopping.

I had not visited the shop before but it was highly recommended by my kinky friends Silk and Gloss; after our shopping trip I can concur with my kinky friends; it is wonderful. Whatever your kink they can sell you something! Latex clothing is just a small part of their stock. They have a website and do mail order so distance is not a problem, they ship all over the world.

The helpful and friendly staff were great fun to talk to and persuaded MA to buy an outrageous outfit that is so not her normal style. Lovely!

Take a virtual browse of the shop. We must go back when we have more time and take a really good look around.

MA wiggled her bum and squirmed.
“It feels cold and, and…”
I pushed the ginger up her bum.
She squirmed and gasped. “Oh it stings!” She buried her face in the pillow. Much bum wiggling followed.
I ran my hand along her back and onto her bum. I squeezed her cheeks. Not an easy task with all that wiggling going on.
“Oh it burns. OWWWWW!”
I changed tactics and took to gently kissing her all over. Distracting her. It did not work!

Despite all her complaints and bum wiggling she never asked for it to stop!

After a while the complaining and wiggling subsided.
“It’s quite nice now.”
I ran my hand down her back and over her bum and between her legs.
“Wet! You’re very wet.” She tried to push herself against my hand and wiggle but I pulled my hand away.
“Oh you stopped.”
I pulled out the ginger root.
I took a dice out of the toy box and showed it to her.
“Lets play a game, three choices?” I suggested.
She looked quizzical.
“Choice one, you get sex right now!”
“Yes please!” she seemed keen on the first choice.
“Choice two, you get a light flogging with this.” I waved the red suede flogger in the air. “Then you get sex.”
“Yes?” A guarded yes, she did not seem so keen on the flogger.
“Choice three, we get dressed and go out for a nice meal and continue when we get back.”
“Really? Keep me frustrated the whole evening, that’s a dreadful tease.”
I grinned at her. “Roll the dice, choose, first option is 1 and 2, second option 3 and 4, last option 5 and 6, got that?”
“I think so.” she rolled the dice across the bed.
“SIX! We really going out?”
“Yes, get up and get dressed!” I pulled her up and out of bed.

We sat in a quiet corner of the restaurant. MA sipped her wine.
“Sitting comfortably?”
She smiled and wiggled in her seat. “I tingle down there.”
“Is it nice?”
“It’s nice now but I still want to…” the sentence trailed off but her expression finished it for her.
“You want sex don’t you.” I whispered.
“Yes.” she flushed slightly with embarrassment, as if she was afraid to admit her desires.
I laid the dice on the table.
“The first two options are the same as before, as soon as we get home, but option three is different.”
“What’s option three then?”
“Control passes to you, you get to choose what happens.”
She picked up the dice. “Choose now?” she asked.
“Now, before the food arrives.” I confirmed.
The dice clattered over the table, stopping by my glass. (Full of water I was driving!)
“Four!” She looked worried.
“Flogger then sex.” The conversation was cut short as the food arrived.

We ate the food in silence for a while.
“You said you liked the flogger when I demonstrated it a few days ago.”
“That was one spank over my knickers, I think this will be different. I am not sure about it.”
“It will be different, but trust me it will be good, you’ll enjoy the sensation.”
She still looked worried.

“You get a choice, I can show just a few of the items I have, or you can go all out and I’ll just tip the whole box onto the bed?”
“Go for it. Let’s see how perverted you really are!”

I was introducing my new vanilla friend MA to the world of BDSM. I had told her I was a total pervert but so far she had not really believed me. Until now.

I took my toy box down from the over cab luton in my RV and opened it up. I tipped the contents on to the bed.
“There you go, that’s everything.” Her eyes were wide in amazement.
“Yup, you’re a total pervert. Have you used all of this stuff?” She waved the carpet beater in the air.
“I do the carpets regular with that.”
She looked around. “You haven’t got any carpets.”
“Oh so I haven’t, so I must spank naughty girls with it. Or maybe they spank me …”
She looked at the handcuffs, the leg cuffs, the collars and leashes. She held up a leash. “Really? Lead some one around?”
“Yes, I was led around a pervy party, naked, just the collar and leash.”
She looked at the canes, the paddles, the hair brushes and the floggers.
“This whip thing looks harmless.” She waved the red flogger in the air.
“It’s a suede flogger, it’s nice, you can tickle someone with the soft tails, then spank then with it.”
“Does it hurt?”
“Roll on your tummy and I’ll let you find out.”
She hesitated. “I don’t know if I want to.”
“One spank, over your jammies.”
She rolled over. She screwed her face up as if waiting for excruciating pain.
Her top had pulled up leaving the small of her back exposed. I gently ran the tails of the flogger across her bare skin. She wriggled, obviously enjoying the sensation.
“That’s nice.” I spanked her on the bottom. Once. Quite hard.
“Oh. Ow!”
“OK?”
She giggled. “That was OK.”
She picked up a Tupperware box and shook it. It rattled. She opened the box.
“What possible pervy use is a vegetable peeler?”
“That’s for ginger root.”
“And?”
“I think it’s easier to find you the internet page to read. You’re going to be very surprised.”
She pulled her MacBook out of it’s case and booted it up. “OK then what am I looking for?”
“Figging.”
She typed the word into Google. Time passed, lots of time. Her face was a picture.
“You’ve done this? Silly question you have a peeler in a box that smells of ginger. Do you do this or have it done to you?”
“Both.”
“So what’s with the ginger thing? What’s the attraction?”
“Well it stings, burns and it acts like an aphrodisiac, makes people randy. It makes me very randy and gives me a huge hard on.”
“Perhaps we should go grocery shopping, I want to try it out.”
“You realise that you just got depraved and corrupted by me?”
“So I did, what fun.”

On a lighter note: rude pictures!

More of this at Nena Blue. And it’s VERY rude.

Over on her blog Pandora raises some interesting views on spanking porn.

Pandora is about to launch a pay web site featuring spanking porn. I can’t wait and will be first in the queue with my credit card in my hot sweaty hand. But I digress.

Pandora wants to feature all kinds of spanking porn, and to aim that porn at a wide audience, both straight, gay male and female. The problem is that the biggest consumer of paid for porn is straight males, and they have narrow tastes when it comes to porn. Men want to see men spanking girls or girls spanking girls. So Pandora’s idea of some male/male or female/male porn, as well as the more mainstream male/female female/female, may not go down to well with the largest percentage of her audience.

Well I have contrary view. Publish and be damned Pandora, I quite like the idea of see some boys bums getting a good thrashing, and I don’t much care if it’s another boy or a girl with the implement!

Some time ago (the sadly missed) Niki Flynn and Ludwig produced a really cute video of Niki thrashing Ludwig. I loved it and I was eagerly awaiting the sequel but it looks like it’s not to be since Niki retired. I also offered my own bottom as a target if Ludwig fancied a bit of revenge but it looks like that may not happen either.

My point is that the only way to open kinky minds and pull them away from their deeply held and narrow view of porn is to offer them something different and suggest that they have a look.

Boys or girls. Cute bums getting spanked, what’s not to like?

TW leaned over and rested her head on my shoulder. Her fingers twiddled with some of the hairs on my chest.
“What do you like?” she asked.
“All sorts of things.” I responded.
“In bed, what do you like?” She twisted her head to look at me. “What floats your boat?”
I hesitated, how do you tell someone you’re kinky?
She twiddled the hairs on my chest, then tuggged them.
“Yow! That hurt.”
“Do you like that? I think you do.”
I had a funny feeling, suddenly I felt that I had been set up. A bit like deja vu.
“Do you, what else do you know?”
“Lots of things, I have been chasing after you for a while and you compleatly ignored me. I had to assault you in the shower to get you to even look at me.”
“That was nice.”
She sat up, banged her head on the RV’s roof and turned to face me.
“Look at me, who am I?”
“TW?”
“Yes but, WHO AM I? You don’t recognise me, don’t I remind you of someone?”
“I am not very good at this, sorry but no.”
“I was told you were a bit useless like this, fix a camper’s electics in a trice, but this sort of thing and you’re lost.”
“Sorry, it’s just the way I am, some girls like it.”
“I like it, I like it lots. I must remind you of someone, someone you know very well?”
I shook my head.
“Really you don’t know. She played cupid and told me all about you.”
“Who?”
“My sister, OO.”
“Your sister is OO. Have I been set up?”
“Totally, do you mind?”
She flashed that big smile and then I saw the likeness.
“She said that this really nice kinky boy was looking for a friend as he was all lonely on his own in the nudist club. Here I am to rescue you.”

My head was spinning, so much to take in. I lay there thinking: Well, that solves the problem of how to tell her I like kinky stuff.